MY FOREVER IS GONE

NUMB

Its really hard to tell someone you love them
when they are already slipping away,
When its a matter of time
and they will say goodbye,
You wanted to fight and hold them tight
so they could never be out of your sight,
But yours hands are cold
and your feet can't move,
Then suddenly, you can't feel anything.

As you watch them leave tears begin to show,
and memories of yesterday follow,
But yours hands are cold
and your feet can't move,
Then suddenly, you can't feel anything.

March 31,2009
I made this for my Forever.
The very same day, I lost her.
I just thought, if Forever is gone, what's there to look forward to?

haizt....

AN OPEN LETTER FOR MY BOSS

A good leader must motivate her people to be the best they can be by appreciating good things they've done - not their flaws"

Its so frustrating that despite of coming in to work and after all the efforts of doing more than what is expected, you'll be unappreciated. Worst is that you are always behind me saying things that really demotivates me. You always make me feel, as if I'm not doing my job well. That even makes it even more frustrating because I know my responsibilities and I'm not being slack about my work.

There was a time when I needed an emergency leave because my mom will have a cataract surgery. You filed for it and have it approved BUT you said a lot of things. You said I should improve my performance because the company is very considerate about giving me leaves. I myself knows, I've been working so hard to get high numbers for you because no one wants to be a burden for the team. Another manager told me that leaves has nothing to do with my performance. Its my priviledge and right as an employee. I understand you being concern about my performance because you are my Manager. But theres a better way and time of saying it. The moment you told me that, I was in my station. So I was embarrassed because most of the people on the floor heard it. As we all working in a huge place. You did it on purpose. That wasn't the first time and you didn't stop there.

Few days ago, while you are on maternity leave, you sent us a message about how our performance is going. We appreciate the fact that you are still monitoring us. But reality check, you are on leave. Everyone on the team wants you to enjoy the time with your new baby and with your family. And its our day off. So please spare us just this once. Give us a time to forget stuff about work. Please give us a break, we are so stressed not because of the kind of job that we have, but because of YOU!!!! all because of YOU!!!!!

questions

Whenever I'm sad I got used to write something about what I feel. Doing so makes me feel somewhat better. This is one of my creations, that I'm really proud off. I wrote this one while I'm at work. Enjoy!

QUESTIONS
December 20, 2008 3:27 AM

Are you gonna say goodbye?
When you know the next day you will be gone?
Why do you make things hard for her?
When you know that you really can't stay.

How could you pretend everything is alright?
You keep on telling the same old lies,
How could you make her believe
and give such promises you just can't keep?

I don't know why you are so numb?
Taking her for granted despite everything she does.
Can't you see how she wants you?
and how she wants to be with you?

This is our story.
This is about me and you.
It will never be a happy ending.
There is no me and you.

first love

Its weird. I found myself thinking of you. And then I said well, its been so long since I heard your voice, I saw your face and held you close. Well, time really pass so quickly. Yes, its been 4 long years. But It can't be that I'm missing you. No, not now.

I wonder how you look like right now? Is your hair still short and soft? Or you tried having it a bit longer. Do you have a dark skin now because you're always out on the sun? Does your eyes get small when you smile? (Oh, you know that I can't get over with those little eyes!) And I bet you still wear the killer smile that makes every women go crazy (and I'm indeed one of them).

I'm jealous. Knowing someone is loving you right now. Much worst because I know you love her too. Thinking my world is revolving with its new universe. Its so sad. It makes me wanna exchange place with her. I want to be with you again. I want to talk to you everyday and every night like we used to. I will never get annoyed if you will give me those funny names again. Yeah, I know you just want to make me smile. God, how I really miss laughing with you. I miss being with you.

But I don't know where you are. I got tired of running after you. I did my part and you weren't there.. You know, I almost lost a heart from loving you. I guess this is reality waking me up in this dream once again. Ah,,, what a beautiful dream...

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Sometimes, its really nice to go back and reminisce. Especially if you are lost in the present, this can help you find the way again...